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Life Coaching and Multitasking – How It Helps Me

2015. 01. 24.
Anna Jankovich
Anna Jankovich
Coaching Transitions
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Life Coaching and Multitasking

 

PerilsOfMultitasking

 

Like many of us, I have always multitasked, both at work and at home. The more I have to do or was given, the more adrenaline I would get.  There is a saying along the lines of “if you want a task done, give it to the busiest person,” that has always been me.

During one of my Life Coaching trainings, in Oslo, I remember one of the trainers asking us, “How does multitasking look like for you? Take a moment and draw a picture of it in your head and step into that feeling.”  I had an image of me juggling many balls at the same time and walking around between work and home, looking up and down and feeling a slight pain in my neck and shoulders.  I could feel my heart beating strongly and eventually my arms and legs getting sore from being in the same stance the whole time.  I also felt the moment I could let one ball go, soon to be replaced by another and continue. I felt tired.

Next question, “How do you WANT to picture multitasking?” Immediately, I had an imagine of calmness.  I pictured myself in my own space, with sunlight, music, a comfortable chair and many different coloured baskets around me, each with its own task.  I wanted to be aware of what was around me and I did not want to feel any strain on my body.  The picture was becoming clearer and clearer. I felt calm.

Managing time is not about squeezing as many tasks as possible in a day. It is about making clearing space to make time for yourself, for your family/social life and your rest.

This is one of the most common issues I encounter with my clients, during our Life Coaching sessions, as they seek new tools for multitasking their challenges between work and home.  In Life Coaching, clients create their own plan of action and I hold them accountable for it, which proves to be very effective and I myself learn along the way.

Here are 10 Successful Tools my clients have created for themselves and achieved:

 

  1. PostIts: prioritising tasks by different PostIt colours into 3 categories ie. “important, need, want” and sticking them on a visible space.  As a task is completed, a PostIt is removed. Great measuring tool!
  2. Time Slots: allocating their tasks into time slots and sticking to them, one at a time.
  3. Turning Off Tones: switching off any message signals from their devices.
  4. Informing Others: writing a message/email informing senders that they are not available to reply until a given hour (this also manages their expectations).
  5. Moving: in between tasks to exercise, stretch, get some air, change rooms, take a walk, a quick meditation.
  6. Asking Themselves:  is this really the wisest way of using my time?
  7. Learning to Say NO: not easy at all and accepting that it’s OK that they can’t do it all.
  8. Motivation: imagining how they will feel when the tasks are done. Music, audio books while driving, quotations, articles are all tools they use.
  9. Recording: taking notes how much time a day they take to shower/dress, have another cup of coffee, use social media, chatting to others, working, shopping and then analysing it.
  10. Decluttering: cleaning up a desk, a room, an office which gives them more time to spend working, and less time searching for what they are looking for.

Thanks to Life Coaching and to some of my client’s tools,  I am achieving this calmness slowly and because I want it so badly, my awareness reminds me of it.   My achievements are greater, more efficient, focused and organised.  I have to admit that it is not always easy. However, it does get easier everyday! Life Coaching and multitasking go hand in hand.

One thing that I can promise you, there are 24 hours in a day to do what you want. So what do you need to do to reach this fulfilment?

How to Feel Empowered in an Argument

2014. 11. 30.
Anna Jankovich
Anna Jankovich
Coaching Transitions
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“How to keep calm in an argument is one of those lessons in life we should have been taught in school,” a client of mine recently said, as he struggled with a colleague at work.  Helas, most of us find out the hard way by actually not keeping calm and letting the argument spiral downwards leading to a negative outcome.

keep-calm-and-feel-empowered

His remark struck an instant cord with me, as I have been one of these emotional, lashing-out types, which I have blamed on my Russian blood and my French impatience (need to blame it on something!).  When I flared up,  I was convinced of what I was saying and the louder I got, the more I thought my message would be stronger.  Then a few years ago, at the same time I was discovering Life Coaching, I was on the receiving end and being lashed out at.  I was struck by the nastiness of it and actually felt empathy for that person.  I began seeing an argument from another angle.

Arguments can happen anywhere; work, home, families, taxis, shops, airports, restaurants and in any language.  Arguments don’t work; they are destructive, negative, exhausting, emotional, unresolved, hurtful and SUCH A WASTE OF TIME!

Take a moment and think back at an argument you had and remember that feeling. Step into it – what was your body language? How did you sound? What emotions were stirring?

Life Coaching has helped many of us tremendously in the last years to look at an argument from a different angle. Instead of the familiar “emotional, lashing out perspective,” I now automatically choose the “calm perspective.”  On the rare occasion I feel a heated discussion rising, I am immediately aware of my own being and I know how I want to be.

Here are 10 Tools to Help Keep You Calm 

  1. Breathing: this gives you a few seconds to be calm, listen and gather your thoughts.
  2. Listening: if you are thinking what is the next thing you want to say, then you are not listening.
  3. Hearing: Hear your own words and listen consciously to what you are saying.
  4. Never Shout: when shouting you lose control and it is hard to think clearly.
  5. Body Language: stay open like your mind, sit/stand grounded, look at the person in the eyes, avoid crossed arms, frowning, pointing, keep your focus on them                                                                                                                             (TIP: if looking in the eyes is difficult for you, look in between the other person’s eyes…it looks as though you are staring right at them, but you are not!)
  6. Avoid Scolding: insults are the ultimate tool of ignorance!
  7. Space: hold that space to let the other “get it all out.”
  8. Drop Your Ego: forget your ego and aim for a “win-win” situation, which could be compromise
  9. Your Captain (read more http://annajankovich.com/2014/10/captain/): what is your inner authority telling you?
  10. Permission: ask permission to not be interrupted while you speak

 

Two More Things to Remember:

  • Don’t use a present argument to list all the misconducts from the past, do you want to be dragged back in the past?
  • Lashing out is a way of someone expressing how they really feel and shows a total lack of self-control. By staying calm, YOU empower yourself.

Who do you want to be in your next argument?