Like many of us, I have always multitasked, both at work and at home. The more I have to do or was given, the more adrenaline I would get. There is a saying along the lines of “if you want a task done, give it to the busiest person,” that has always been me.
During one of my Life Coaching trainings, in Oslo, I remember one of the trainers asking us, “How does multitasking look like for you? Take a moment and draw a picture of it in your head and step into that feeling.” I had an image of me juggling many balls at the same time and walking around between work and home, looking up and down and feeling a slight pain in my neck and shoulders. I could feel my heart beating strongly and eventually my arms and legs getting sore from being in the same stance the whole time. I also felt the moment I could let one ball go, soon to be replaced by another and continue. I felt tired.
Next question, “How do you WANT to picture multitasking?” Immediately, I had an imagine of calmness. I pictured myself in my own space, with sunlight, music, a comfortable chair and many different coloured baskets around me, each with its own task. I wanted to be aware of what was around me and I did not want to feel any strain on my body. The picture was becoming clearer and clearer. I felt calm.
Managing time is not about squeezing as many tasks as possible in a day. It is about making clearing space to make time for yourself, for your family/social life and your rest.
This is one of the most common issues I encounter with my clients, during our Life Coaching sessions, as they seek new tools for multitasking their challenges between work and home. In Life Coaching, clients create their own plan of action and I hold them accountable for it, which proves to be very effective and I myself learn along the way.
Thanks to Life Coaching and to some of my client’s tools, I am achieving this calmness slowly and because I want it so badly, my awareness reminds me of it. My achievements are greater, more efficient, focused and organised. I have to admit that it is not always easy. However, it does get easier everyday! Life Coaching and multitasking go hand in hand.
One thing that I can promise you, there are 24 hours in a day to do what you want. So what do you need to do to reach this fulfilment?
“How to keep calm in an argument is one of those lessons in life we should have been taught in school,” a client of mine recently said, as he struggled with a colleague at work. Helas, most of us find out the hard way by actually not keeping calm and letting the argument spiral downwards leading to a negative outcome.
His remark struck an instant cord with me, as I have been one of these emotional, lashing-out types, which I have blamed on my Russian blood and my French impatience (need to blame it on something!). When I flared up, I was convinced of what I was saying and the louder I got, the more I thought my message would be stronger. Then a few years ago, at the same time I was discovering Life Coaching, I was on the receiving end and being lashed out at. I was struck by the nastiness of it and actually felt empathy for that person. I began seeing an argument from another angle.
Arguments can happen anywhere; work, home, families, taxis, shops, airports, restaurants and in any language. Arguments don’t work; they are destructive, negative, exhausting, emotional, unresolved, hurtful and SUCH A WASTE OF TIME!
Take a moment and think back at an argument you had and remember that feeling. Step into it – what was your body language? How did you sound? What emotions were stirring?
Life Coaching has helped many of us tremendously in the last years to look at an argument from a different angle. Instead of the familiar “emotional, lashing out perspective,” I now automatically choose the “calm perspective.” On the rare occasion I feel a heated discussion rising, I am immediately aware of my own being and I know how I want to be.
Here are 10 Tools to Help Keep You Calm
Two More Things to Remember:
Who do you want to be in your next argument?
(c) 2018 Anna Jankovich, all rights reserved.